Help needed.

Man oh man do I need an enema!!!
I've been blocked up for almost 2 weeks!
I'm afraid that **** is going to start coming out of my ears if I don't take
a dump soon.
My question is: Do you think I should take a regular enema or a high
colonic?
Thanks for your help.

"xmen" wrote in message
...
Man oh man do I need an enema!!!
I've been blocked up for almost 2 weeks!
I'm afraid that **** is going to start coming out of my ears if I don't
take
a dump soon.
My question is: Do you think I should take a regular enema or a high
colonic?
Thanks for your help.

All you really need is incentive. Take a Melville novel to the bathroom
with you and don't get up until either it or you is done.

htd

In article 5adjd.886$SC5.136@trnddc01,
"herothatdied" wrote:

All you really need is incentive. Take a Melville novel to the bathroom
with you and don't get up until either it or you is done.

That may not work. He might choose Billy Budd.

"Scot Kamins" wrote in message
...
In article 5adjd.886$SC5.136@trnddc01,
"herothatdied" wrote:

All you really need is incentive. Take a Melville novel to the bathroom
with you and don't get up until either it or you is done.

That may not work. He might choose Billy Budd.

All right, how about Milton's prose?

Oooh - or, if he hasn't read it yet, _The Shining_. That scared me
****less...

On Sat, 6 Nov 2004 17:49:20 -0500, "xmen" wrote:

Man oh man do I need an enema!!!

Gee, if you need an enema, why don't you just go an get an enema? The
only people you should discuss your bowel movements with is your
spouse (they left it out of the marriage vows, but it's implied) and
your children (so it can become part of family lore). I suggest a
coffee enema, shaken not stirred.

At last I took a dump!!!
Must have weighed about 15 pounds if it weighed an ounce!
And did it stink! PU!!!!!!
But let me tell you it wasn't easy!
My wife gave me about 25 Fleet enemas before I could even cut a fart!
Well I just thought you all would be glad to know my plumbing is back to
normal and I'm looking forward to many months of regular, pleasant bowel
movements.

On Wed, 10 Nov 2004 09:15:03 -0500, "xmen" wrote:

At last I took a dump!!!
Must have weighed about 15 pounds if it weighed an ounce!
And did it stink! PU!!!!!!
But let me tell you it wasn't easy!
My wife gave me about 25 Fleet enemas before I could even cut a fart!
Well I just thought you all would be glad to know my plumbing is back to
normal and I'm looking forward to many months of regular, pleasant bowel
movements.

There are plenty of places where you can post a blog of your trips to the bog.


This isn't one of them.

(Steve Hayes) writes:

[Slap!]

There are plenty of places where you can post a blog of your trips to the
bog.


This isn't one of them.

Thanks, he needed that.

I had my fill of Martin Luther's stomach problems when I read his
biography several years ago. "Frankly, Marty, you've told
me more than I need to know," I would've told him if he
were a subordinate. "Take the day off and get it out of your
system." But the man's chronic complaint obviously indicated
something more serious than the after effects of hot tamales.

Is it that influential people come upon all their notions while
seated on the crapper? Why can't they be more like Planck who
conceived quantum physics while walking through a wooded
park in Berlin or Einstein who took all-weather hikes though
the hillside above Zurich, and then as much to get out of the
house from Mileva and the crying kid?

(It's urban hiking for me with a pocket radio/cassette player
and earphones. I do an 8-mile round trip to a coffee
house which is a few doors from several bookstores.)

"Steve Hayes" wrote

There are plenty of places where you can post a blog of your trips to the
bog.
This isn't one of them.

NONSENSE!
The entire world is interested in my BMs.
Get with the program Steve!
Just to let you all know, I took a nice healthy dump this morning. Back on
schedule!

On Thu, 11 Nov 2004 11:54:22 -0500, "xmen" wrote:

"Steve Hayes" wrote

There are plenty of places where you can post a blog of your trips to the
bog.
This isn't one of them.

NONSENSE!
The entire world is interested in my BMs.
Get with the program Steve!
Just to let you all know, I took a nice healthy dump this morning. Back on
schedule!

Thanks for posting in the right forum this time.


--
Steve Hayes from Tshwane, South Africa
http://www.geocities.com/Athens/7734/stevesig.htm
E-mail - see web page, or parse: shayes at dunelm full stop org full stop uk