"Weirdly Supernatural" - Issue Two Finally Available

(Haunted River) wrote in message . com...

HE FINALLY ANSWERS MY QUESTION! How late much later would this had
been if I hadn't goaded you over to that copy machine a little
faster???

The eagerly awaited second issue of Weirdly Supernatural is being
printed this week and will be available for posting early next week.


Good! The end of the month is nigh and I am almost out of toilet
paper.


Issue Two clocks in at over 100 pages and features the following
items:

"Clocks in" a little late if you ask me.



* Introduction, and Reminscence On Joan Aiken by Reggie Oliver

Please tell us this wasn't a "planned project". Good thing for you
that she died or you wouldn't have filled this "Issue".



* A World Of Shadows: The Novels Of Phyllis Paul by Glen Cavaliero

Who?


* Ghost Stories and More Ghost Stories Of An Antiquary
(Bibliographical notes)

Plagerizing James I see.


* The Dark Fantasies Of L.P. Hartley By Cardinal Cox

No thanks. I can read Hartley for myself.


* Beyond The Fens By Christopher Barker

You missed a "c" in the "fence" and an "f" in the "Barfer".


* Unpleasant Demons: Violence and Cruelty in the Jamesian Tale By
Christopher Barker

Sounds like a piece of crap. Wouldn't read it if it was Free.


* The Legacy By Joan Aiken

Is this her last tale? Too bad no one will read it until it is
reprinted elsewhere.


* The Case Of The Annoying Dwarf, A Prince Stenbock Chronicle by An
Aesthetical

Are you in Preschool? Is this what subscribers want? More of your
crappy ruminations on penises and hairless little boys bottoms?


* The Effort To Rise By Debbie Shayne

Sounds like more of the same goofy sex theories of yours.


* Ghostly Quiz

Stolen from rbadac most likely.


* Long Service By David G. Rowlands (a variant version - the one
Derleth rejected!)

Rejected by Derleth! How enticing!



* The Three Black Cats By the Rev. A.D. Crake [1888]

Boring! Already too many cat tales in the genre.



* The Skins By Reggie Oliver

I hope to God this finds print elsewhere.



* Reviews by David Longhorn, Reggie Oliver

So far so good....

and the editor.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! More feces!!!!!!


* Quiz Answers

Which you had to look up I presume. Not very hopeful for future
WEIRDLY SUPERNATUL issues that you put the questions and anwers in the
same installment is it??? Not very hopeful that you put a Q & A into a
scholarly journal to begin with either!!!!!



* Ghost Stories On Cigarette Cards: Hodgson’s THE HOUSE ON THE
BORDERLAND. Adapted by William Burroughs

How many F-bombs does Burroughs manage to cram on the back of a card?


* Original artwork by Reggie Oliver

Editor: Chris Barker

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! NO WAY I AM BUYIN' THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Editorial Consultant: Reggie Oliver

Limited to 100 copies, the majority of which have already been
reserved by subscribers.

100!?!?!?!?!? A whole 100?!?!?!? Your a joke.



Contrary to wild reports in a tiny unimportant section of somewhere,
we are disinterested in soliciting reviews, especially biased ones.
Indeed, two of the previous All Hallows reviews for Haunted River
products were based upon the proprietors of All Hallows haing slyly
procured copies from indirect sources!

HAHAHAHAHA! I really doubt that they care at all about your rag.



The prose quality of WS2 will be judged by our subscribers and writing
peers, not by envious rivals.

All 100 of them??? HeeHee!



Thank you for listening!


No, no, thank YOU for amusing us.



Chris Barker
The Haunted River
www.users.waitrose.com/~hauntedriver

PS. We hope to announce two exciting new projects for 2004 later this
spring. Details will be posted on the website.

Don't bother. We are no longer buying.


Sincerely,


Everyone

(deathdream) wrote in message om...
(Haunted River) wrote in message . com...

HE FINALLY ANSWERS MY QUESTION! How late much later would this had
been if I hadn't goaded you over to that copy machine a little
faster???

The eagerly awaited second issue of Weirdly Supernatural is being
printed this week and will be available for posting early next week.


Good! The end of the month is nigh and I am almost out of toilet
paper.


Issue Two clocks in at over 100 pages and features the following
items:

"Clocks in" a little late if you ask me.



* Introduction, and Reminscence On Joan Aiken by Reggie Oliver

Please tell us this wasn't a "planned project". Good thing for you
that she died or you wouldn't have filled this "Issue".



* A World Of Shadows: The Novels Of Phyllis Paul by Glen Cavaliero

Who?


* Ghost Stories and More Ghost Stories Of An Antiquary
(Bibliographical notes)

Plagerizing James I see.


* The Dark Fantasies Of L.P. Hartley By Cardinal Cox

No thanks. I can read Hartley for myself.


* Beyond The Fens By Christopher Barker

You missed a "c" in the "fence" and an "f" in the "Barfer".


* Unpleasant Demons: Violence and Cruelty in the Jamesian Tale By
Christopher Barker

Sounds like a piece of crap. Wouldn't read it if it was Free.


* The Legacy By Joan Aiken

Is this her last tale? Too bad no one will read it until it is
reprinted elsewhere.


* The Case Of The Annoying Dwarf, A Prince Stenbock Chronicle by An
Aesthetical

Are you in Preschool? Is this what subscribers want? More of your
crappy ruminations on penises and hairless little boys bottoms?


* The Effort To Rise By Debbie Shayne

Sounds like more of the same goofy sex theories of yours.


* Ghostly Quiz

Stolen from rbadac most likely.


* Long Service By David G. Rowlands (a variant version - the one
Derleth rejected!)

Rejected by Derleth! How enticing!



* The Three Black Cats By the Rev. A.D. Crake [1888]

Boring! Already too many cat tales in the genre.



* The Skins By Reggie Oliver

I hope to God this finds print elsewhere.



* Reviews by David Longhorn, Reggie Oliver

So far so good....

and the editor.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! More feces!!!!!!


* Quiz Answers

Which you had to look up I presume. Not very hopeful for future
WEIRDLY SUPERNATUL issues that you put the questions and anwers in the
same installment is it??? Not very hopeful that you put a Q & A into a
scholarly journal to begin with either!!!!!



* Ghost Stories On Cigarette Cards: Hodgson’s THE HOUSE ON THE
BORDERLAND. Adapted by William Burroughs

How many F-bombs does Burroughs manage to cram on the back of a card?


* Original artwork by Reggie Oliver

Editor: Chris Barker

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! NO WAY I AM BUYIN' THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Editorial Consultant: Reggie Oliver

Limited to 100 copies, the majority of which have already been
reserved by subscribers.

100!?!?!?!?!? A whole 100?!?!?!? Your a joke.



Contrary to wild reports in a tiny unimportant section of somewhere,
we are disinterested in soliciting reviews, especially biased ones.
Indeed, two of the previous All Hallows reviews for Haunted River
products were based upon the proprietors of All Hallows haing slyly
procured copies from indirect sources!

HAHAHAHAHA! I really doubt that they care at all about your rag.



The prose quality of WS2 will be judged by our subscribers and writing
peers, not by envious rivals.

All 100 of them??? HeeHee!



Thank you for listening!


No, no, thank YOU for amusing us.



Chris Barker
The Haunted River
www.users.waitrose.com/~hauntedriver

PS. We hope to announce two exciting new projects for 2004 later this
spring. Details will be posted on the website.

Don't bother. We are no longer buying.


Sincerely,


Everyone

This is the best review I have read this year.

Chris Barker